They may be subconscious, but we all have innate expectations about how things are supposed to be in the world, including how other people are supposed to conduct themselves. These expectations can be a source of distress when they are not met. For example, a parent may have expectations for their child's behavior. If the child does not meet these expectations, the parent can become frustrated.
There are two ways to close the gap between expectations and reality. The first way is to try to convince the other person to behave the way you expect them to. However, this does not usually work.
The second way to close the gap is to release your expectations. Instead of expecting certain behavior, be curious about the reality of the situation. Why is the other person behaving the way they are? What core beliefs and life experiences shape their behavior? We can also be curious about our own expectations and where they come from. Why do we expect what we expect?
Realistically, the only expectations we can manage is our own. By exploring our unfulfilled expectations, we can better understand ourselves and others.
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By exploring unmet expectations, we can better understand ourselves and others.
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